redd (mynewhero) wrote,

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What I did in my Hibernation by redd, age 30.

I’ve been in hibernation, well that’s my excuse anyway. That and Facebook updates are so much easier to write, especially when I’m drunk. Also, as it turns out, quite easy for my boss to see (privacy options my hole) so I’m back here to scrawl on the back-left-foot that is livejournal of the giant-elephant-full-of-tubes that is the internet. (that’s right queen_of_six I’m sticking to this analogy no matter how clumsy, it’s mine and I like elephants). I’ll still update Facebook but more along the lines of ‘feeling awesomely customer-centric today’,’ blue sky thinking ahoy!’, ‘My manager is not getting enough high fives’ that sort of thing.

Seems pretty quiet here too, 90% of my friends page is lolcats. Nice. Less people = more room for me to shite-on without repercussions. So hey three people I know who still post, what are the haps? Anyway here’s my obligatory catch up.

What I did in my Hibernation by redd, age 30.

I rocked Mo’vember. Fact. This seemingly simple hirsutological [googlewhack!] process dragged an unwilling, shy, Andy Dick-esque bunch of IT nerds through the social strata to emerge archetypes of bristling Tom Selleck flavoured manliness. All in the name of Charity! A moustache has to be the single easiest way to change how the world interacts with you. People, previously indifferent to me, were all up in my friendship grill, arms around me, taking my photo and on one memorable occasion even buying me a drink. I shit you not. Everybody wanted a piece of my happy-pie. I cannot stress how good a time I had, making it a sad sad day when me and señor Stalin (too soon?) had to part ways. Still, I raised over a thousand euro to fight prostate cancer and I got to look awesome for a month.

You’re welcome ladies.

December was ATP month. + xmas tree + xmas curse but nobody died so chalk this one up as a win.

There was ATP times two! Once curated by My Bloody Valentine and times the second the ATP 10 Years Birthday festival the following weekend.

It was this
From ATP Nightmare Before Xmas Dec 2009

plus liberal application of

leading to a whole bucket load of this


aaand, i have no idea what's going on here...

Highlights include -me drunkenly hitting some fool in a ‘don’t you go a messin with ma woman’ style. Classy, I know. Even if, technically, 'ma woman' was just trying to punch the wee hipster in the throat. Luckily ATP is officially the only place on earth my physical presence can count as intimidating and it all kind of fizzled out.
-‘Wizard people, Dear reader’ Holy Fucking Balls… I’ll say no more, just get your hands on this somehow and thank me after.
-Deciding to stay in playing Drink-every-time-Delia-Smith-adds-more-butter-to-a-recipe (it’s a working title) instead of going to see Mudhoney. Criminal negligence! true but I had rum and I do love Delia.
-The Yeah Yeah Yeahs; *sigh* I’m in love. Remember those old scenes in the 70’s of teens screaming and fainting at Beatles gigs? Well imagine they’re all matchstick thighed boys in lumberjack shirts with HAIRCUTS and you’re close to the scene that must have greeted Karen O. It was also the prelude to my above John Wayne moment, suffice it to say there was a soupçon of testosterone in the air and heady on its unfamiliar high the boys went a little bananas.
Other bands topping the trumps included: Lightning Bolt, The Melvins, Afrirampo, Deerhoff, Fuck Buttons, Shellac... there's more, but well the later stuff got a little blurry-mashed-together y'know.

And Red Leader!
From ATP 10 Years Dec 2009

My memories of talking this picture aren’t so clear; I recall slapping him on the helmet and demanding his photograph. The kids who actually had to talk to him while I fished about for my camera report he was an incredibly boring dude. You just can’t judge a book by its cover, even if that cover is awesomeballs.

There was food and song and dear Christ was there dance.

Yes, yes there was.

We got the best little xmas tree ever. All bushy and fat and taking up 90% of my floor space. There were presents in which, once again, I got Jen things she either didn’t want or might have wanted had I not secretly bought them for myself. Jen in turn got me awesome presents. I win! This is because I have hobbies while Jen just spends her days reading the paper and punching teens in the throat. (that poor poor hipster).

Xmas curse 2010: I tore my medial meniscus in my knee playing with ninjas.

This is NOT COOL. On the plus side I got to have my very first MRI; they never tell you how loud those things are. Damn you Grey's Anatomy. Damn you and your aural lies!

January was snow and screaming rows with my mother over the fundamental nature of humanity. Good times. Also much be-drunkening of my friends through Martini-jutsu and subjecting their stupefied forms to my full throated renditions of the Dr Horrible musical, while it played on the TV in the background.

They don’t call around so much any more.
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woop. welcome back redd!
YEAH *chestbump*
I am a fan of your awkward analogy. That is all.
Awesome post.

One of the teachers at my school got a proper official verbal warning for slagging the school on facebook. That was supposed to be private too! A colleague dobbed her in. Poohsticks.

Very, very jealous you got to see Yeah Yeah Yeahs. They are just..???? Gah.

I will ATP one day. Highly ironically, very probably when I no longer live on the same bit of island!!!
yep, facebook is buggy as fuck if i see one moe 'whoops, something has gone wrong I'll [insert cunning wordplay joke here a la "i'll book their face alright, except the book IS MY FIST" but with smarter words]

you should ATP it'll be good if we could get organised and get a big group to go again, maybe next xmas?
and this will be my first interaction with facebook in ages... im here to support your return Redd. as for facial hair.... its well weird, that happened when i grey my awful gray bristles... at first it was like magic but then its powers slowly faded and we had to part company...maybe when i have stored up enough facial charisma in my beard glands ill grow one again
have you noticed that the acceptability of sporting a moustache is DIRECTLY proportional to the acceptability of giving passing ladies a playful slap on the bum? but also INVERSELY proportional to the price of houses?!
the current property crash can mean only one thing!
Ladies, I'm sorry but it's MATHS.
A little late, but welcome back.
Also: Facebook, ha!