redd (mynewhero) wrote,

  • Music:

My Very Easy Method Just Sausages Unicorn*. Nice.

Happy Pluto Day+17, (I thought I set a reminder. I was wrong)
Take a moment to cast a sorrowful gaze heavenwards as we, once again, contemplate the great loss to our civilization that is the mistaken classification of Pluto as a planet.

Today I would like you to consider a far of race of super hot nymphomaniac aliens finding the Pioneer deep-space probe (golden plaque, naked folk; you know the one).

Incensed by lust at the sight of the inscribed gentleman’s barnet they blast off into space intent on finding our well coiffed planet and giving us a jolly good banging. But what’s this? the handy ‘return to sender’ printed graphs show a happy little nine-planet Solar System. No astral rumpy pumpy for us. Bad NASA.

In other Big Bang news the Large Hadron** Collider successfully collided some proton beams and didn’t kill us all. Well done science.

*Feel free to substitute the planets actual name for cheap LOLs… if you’re five years old... or me.
**too easy, anyway it’s been done (here)
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